RAIN

HE OWES ME

Learning to walk

Learning to walk

By Melissa Flynn

 

 

 I was recently reassured in my desire to inspire the masses. I want to inspire people to: Get Up! Get Out! And to Be Productive!

“He owes me for all that I have done through the years…I have no money. He does. So he has all the power.”

This was from a fifty-something-year-old man who is looking to his brother for financial aid.

I have repeatedly tried to sway this individual in his desire to seek aid. I have asked him to look within himself. I have asked him to find his purpose in life—figure out what he aspires to do.

“Try to only reach out to others when you are in dire need. If you regularly ask for help, others are less likely to be willing.”

I told him as I have told my son, over and over. “I will only help those who are trying to help themselves.”

I tried to explain that we are owners of our own fates. This reminds me of one of my favorite poems by William Ernest Henley.

“…It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll,
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.”

We all have our trials and hardships, at times. But no matter what, we must learn to refocus, never letting our goals out of sight.

Having this conversation reminded me that I have a lot of work to do. Many people are looking for direction. I want to be a guide to all those that are seeking solutions to all of life’s puzzles. I want people to know that there is hope for us all.

Within my soul, I believe that life is meant to be lived. And we all are here for a purpose. Find yours. And remember not to allow other to take control. It only adds to your sorrow.

As for the earlier mentioned individual, I guess time will tell his fate. But as for me, I’m moving on and trying to make my mother proud.

NEW VIEWS. OR ARE THEY?

Cute boots, huh?

Cute boots, huh?

Explaining the meaning of life...

Explaining the meaning of life…

By Melissa Flynn

It’s 2013 and I’m still moving on. What about you?

Whatever you are doing, please tell me that you didn’t make New Year’s resolutions. Please tell me that you didn’t write down that you wanted to lose weight and dump that loser.

Instead let’s all make a list of life goals. Then every year, I want you all to review and revise those goals. It’s all about retrospection and redesign.

Recently, I did one of my “Moving On” workshops at a local church. I preached the same thing to them—forget resolutions and concentrate on the bigger picture.

My sister Halima has an interesting idea of rebooting that I also shared with the group. At the beginning of each year, she cleans the house, stocks up on all supplies and toiletries, and even backs up her computer. It’s all a bit more than I want to do, but I like the idea. Feel free to read more about her ideas on her blog. (halimaflynn.blogspot.com)

I think we can all agree that it doesn’t hurt to reboot, reorganize or re-evaluate our lives—especially for those times when we feel like we are hitting a wall. It’s like that saying that I have repeated to my son over and over. “If you keep doing something and it isn’t working, then try something different.”

Sometimes when we try to move on, no matter what we do it does not work. That means it is time to re-evaluate—revise your course of action.

I explained my notion of retrospection to the church group. But I also added that we must all pull together and help one another. As I talked, I saw a smile and a nod, here and there. Being presumptuous, as I tend to be, I took those expressions and body language to mean that they agreed and understood.

My talk continued, as it usually does, with me going on and on about my trials and tribulations. I decided to move on from my mess and reach out to help others. (FYI: Helping others helps you. Helping you helps others.) And as many do, I struggle along the way. No matter how great my determination, life doesn’t always work out as planned. I conjure up inspiration wherever I can: a Psalm, a MLK Jr. Speech, The Presidential Inauguration, and maybe even a glance from my mother’s picture in my office.

It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll.
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.

William Ernest Henley

These and many other words, help me maintain my balance. The world needs more beacons of hope and inspiration—people who are willing and able to spread the word that it is never too late to get your life on track. I have decided to be such a person. So if you need a bit of inspiration for any cause, send me a note: movingontoinspire@gmail.com.

If you have a group who needs inspiration, send me a note. If you need a coach to keep you on track, send me a note. Even if you just want to say hi, send me a note.

We all find ways to cope with what life throws at us. Sometimes those coping mechanisms are not very healthy. I can give you some tips to find healthier ones. And in the meantime, I want you all to do two things for me.

 Make a list of goals
 Then get up every day and work towards those goals

And at the end, it is not important whether or not you complete those goals. What are most important are the journey and the people you meet along the way.

To reiterate, forget the making of New Year’s resolutions. According to the definition, resolutions could look a lot like goals. That I can agree with; just don’t wait until January 1st to try and push yourself towards succeeding within the next twelve months. Sit down and set some short and long-term goals for your life. Then be realistic about the things you need to do in order to reach those goals.

And in order to stay focused, I want you all to copy these things down and repeat them regularly.

 I AM SOMEBODY
 WE ARE ALL SOMEBODY
 WE HAVE TO WORK TOGETHER, THAT’S HOW COMMUNITIES GROW
 I WILL IDENTIFY MY FEARS
 I WILL OVERCOME MY FEARS
 I WILL STAY FOCUSED
 I WILL BE A LEADER
 I WILL BE AN EXAMPLE FOR ALL CHILDREN
 I WILL HELP MY NEIGHBORS

As I put this down on paper for you, I was remembering a couple of things: that movie “Pay It Forward” and Ann Curry’s 26 acts of kindness campaign.

So let’s move on and make the most of our time.

Painfully Moving On

These last few weeks have been painful, and I mean that literally. Besides my ongoing shoulder issues, my left foot, my left ankle, my left hip and a bottom tooth have joined the ranks of ‘things that get on my nerves.’

Here is how it started.  A few weeks ago, I sat in my comfy chair – writing, as I do. Reclined with a window open, I enjoyed a bag of Stop and Shop brand Gummi Bears. I popped a red one in my mouth. Crunch?

“That’s weird.”

I ran to the bathroom mirror, only to see a bloody tooth hanging from the root. I guess that’s the last Gummi Bear that I will eat for a while. They were good though.

I’m sure you are thinking, “I need to know this because…?” Well, with my tooth extraction, tooth infection (dry socket) and the pain pills to heal me, my ‘moving on’ has been at a standstill.

That’s not 100% true. I am moving on in my relationships. I’ve told those who need to know that I’m done with the games. I’m done with the do-over’s.  I’m ready for the next chapter in my life.  Whether I like it or not, life is going to keep coming at me. As Grandma Malissia always said, “Life waits for no one.” So, ready or not, things will work out better if I join in.

It’s just the next apartment move that I haven’t done much with yet. I have another couple of months, but it will be here before I know it. And, this body of mine is not working with me. So, if anyone knows where I can get a new one, please share.

When I was 15 years old, I used to wish I could hurry and get older. That shows how much I knew. I had no idea that getter older meant physically getting older. I just thought it meant that I could make my own decisions; no one would be telling me what to do anymore. I could go to the store and buy whatever I wanted.  (That’s really funny, because I’m now thinking “with what money?”) I could see the world and meet famous people. NOT.

There should be a high school class called ‘What Life is Really Going to be like When You are an Adult.’

As an adult, I have seen the country and met lots of people – not necessarily famous people, just people. I don’t mean for that to sound trivial. I think people are what are important in this world. As I move on, I want to meet more people. That’s how you learn. And, I never want to stop learning.

Side note: The Middle and Modern Family — hilarious!

Anyway, as I was saying, I’m going to keep spreading the word that, pain and all, we must keep moving on and trying to see the world. Age is not supposed to be a hindrance to achieving ones goals. I think someone even said that “Life gets better with age.” Someone else said, “With age comes wisdom.” I guess I should meet these people and find out their secrets.

The holiday weekend upon us makes me think that most likely people are out there meeting new people, as I sit here typing. Obviously, I’m home. Not for long; as soon Tuesday gets here, I’m out. Things to do. People to see. Or, is it the other way around? Who knows?

So, for this weekend and post-surgery times to come, help me see the world through your eyes. Tell me where you have gone lately, and who you have talked to. Are you moving on? Or are you just moving? Either way, I’m curious.

I have a little over two weeks before my shoulder surgery, and I’m beginning to get really nervous. I feel like a kid who knows he is going to get a shot at the doctor’s office. My shoulder surgery is a bit more complicated than that, but the fear is the same. Part of my worry is the seclusion that comes afterwards. I think it might be bad if I were out driving after surgery with my left arm – seeing that I’m right-handed. Any thoughts? I’m a pro; I can handle it. I drive with my knees all the time. Oh, you know I’m just kidding, right?

I’ll be good though; I’ll stay in. But, my ‘moving on’ will continue. I may not be physically moving, but things still have to get sorted out. I’ll be searching for places and trying to find some money. By the way, I’m always open to ideas on where to find money. So, please don’t hold back on me. And, keep me in the loop with what’s going on. My mother always did say that I was the curious one.