By Melissa Flynn
It’s 2013 and I’m still moving on. What about you?
Whatever you are doing, please tell me that you didn’t make New Year’s resolutions. Please tell me that you didn’t write down that you wanted to lose weight and dump that loser.
Instead let’s all make a list of life goals. Then every year, I want you all to review and revise those goals. It’s all about retrospection and redesign.
Recently, I did one of my “Moving On” workshops at a local church. I preached the same thing to them—forget resolutions and concentrate on the bigger picture.
My sister Halima has an interesting idea of rebooting that I also shared with the group. At the beginning of each year, she cleans the house, stocks up on all supplies and toiletries, and even backs up her computer. It’s all a bit more than I want to do, but I like the idea. Feel free to read more about her ideas on her blog. (halimaflynn.blogspot.com)
I think we can all agree that it doesn’t hurt to reboot, reorganize or re-evaluate our lives—especially for those times when we feel like we are hitting a wall. It’s like that saying that I have repeated to my son over and over. “If you keep doing something and it isn’t working, then try something different.”
Sometimes when we try to move on, no matter what we do it does not work. That means it is time to re-evaluate—revise your course of action.
I explained my notion of retrospection to the church group. But I also added that we must all pull together and help one another. As I talked, I saw a smile and a nod, here and there. Being presumptuous, as I tend to be, I took those expressions and body language to mean that they agreed and understood.
My talk continued, as it usually does, with me going on and on about my trials and tribulations. I decided to move on from my mess and reach out to help others. (FYI: Helping others helps you. Helping you helps others.) And as many do, I struggle along the way. No matter how great my determination, life doesn’t always work out as planned. I conjure up inspiration wherever I can: a Psalm, a MLK Jr. Speech, The Presidential Inauguration, and maybe even a glance from my mother’s picture in my office.
It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll.
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.
William Ernest Henley
These and many other words, help me maintain my balance. The world needs more beacons of hope and inspiration—people who are willing and able to spread the word that it is never too late to get your life on track. I have decided to be such a person. So if you need a bit of inspiration for any cause, send me a note: firstname.lastname@example.org.
If you have a group who needs inspiration, send me a note. If you need a coach to keep you on track, send me a note. Even if you just want to say hi, send me a note.
We all find ways to cope with what life throws at us. Sometimes those coping mechanisms are not very healthy. I can give you some tips to find healthier ones. And in the meantime, I want you all to do two things for me.
Make a list of goals
Then get up every day and work towards those goals
And at the end, it is not important whether or not you complete those goals. What are most important are the journey and the people you meet along the way.
To reiterate, forget the making of New Year’s resolutions. According to the definition, resolutions could look a lot like goals. That I can agree with; just don’t wait until January 1st to try and push yourself towards succeeding within the next twelve months. Sit down and set some short and long-term goals for your life. Then be realistic about the things you need to do in order to reach those goals.
And in order to stay focused, I want you all to copy these things down and repeat them regularly.
I AM SOMEBODY
WE ARE ALL SOMEBODY
WE HAVE TO WORK TOGETHER, THAT’S HOW COMMUNITIES GROW
I WILL IDENTIFY MY FEARS
I WILL OVERCOME MY FEARS
I WILL STAY FOCUSED
I WILL BE A LEADER
I WILL BE AN EXAMPLE FOR ALL CHILDREN
I WILL HELP MY NEIGHBORS
As I put this down on paper for you, I was remembering a couple of things: that movie “Pay It Forward” and Ann Curry’s 26 acts of kindness campaign.
So let’s move on and make the most of our time.